A bit of a Barney

Image courtesy of Pixabay

There is something of a gale blowing outside with strange thumps and rattles that sound like harbingers of Halloween on the rampage but are probably just the contents of my recycling bin rolling down the hill.

I'm not allowing myself to be frightened though because I know this storm is called Barney and frankly anything named after a cuddly purple dinosaur surely can't be that scary - because everyone knows that Barney isn't a real dinosaur!

I wasn't too sure where the idea to suddenly start naming UK weather systems came from so I turned to my trusty adviser Google for answers and it turns out make good sense. Giving a storm a name makes it easier to talk about - rather than just another big wind. Apparently we are to expect Clodagh next followed by Desmond and so on as we alternate male and female throughout the alphabet - but sadly skipping Gail the gale. The one I'm really looking forward to though is Wendy Windblows...

***

In an effort to kick start my blogging again, I am joining with this 30 day challenge to see if I can keep on blogging for 30 days. Well, here's Day 1!

Reminders

When I started this blog back in the olden days of 2009, when I was still in my 30s and forgotten what a paintbrush was for, back then I had a purpose and that purpose was to write. I was to write something as close to every day as I could manage. It wasn't about creating perfect prose, but rather just the exercising of words on 'paper', a purging and a practice.

Back then it was easy. I just wrote. But then I started sharing my work with others and suddenly I had a readership! Then art invaded by psyche and I bonded with global tribes of like-minded creatives. Slowly slowly catchy monkey my blog became a vehicle for my art and a place where I felt I couldn't post unless I had something really interesting to say.

This wasn't always easy. The block began to set itself in quick-drying concrete around my sentences and paragraphs. Cracks appeared as the output dried up. It was a sorry state of affairs.

Then today, in fact, just a few moments ago, Seth Godin reminded me that we never get talkers' block. We've always got something to say out loud, even if it's not set to set the tribal fire alight.

"Write anything" urges the great marketing maestro of a man "because the second best thing to zero is something better than bad".

Oh Seth, I needed to hear that today. From now on I promise that even when I haven't got anything much to say nor any art to post, I will just write. I'll write for me, for practice and for anyone that cares enough to read it.

So Mr Bloggie, you'd better get used to having me around!

Day 4 in the Blogtober House

Hmm... four days in and I'm already struggling to come up with ideas. Mind you today this is the third blog post I've written - the other two for work purposes, so maybe I'm just a bit blogged out today.

So, what to write?

You know what. I'm not going to... I'm going to go downstairs and paint... In the meantime you might like to read this blog post by Umair Haque on the Harvard Business Review website.

He shares his thoughts on why it is so difficult to have a well-paid job with meaning. He pulls out the contrasting examples of bankers and teachers. (The poor bankers do have a hard time of it don't they - always getting picked on! Must be a reason though!!)

It's really worth a read and to me he hits the nail right on the head - with meaning.

Have a read and let me know in the comments what you think and if you agree.

The magic of London

It doesn't take much to coax me down to London so when the invitation came to spend some time with one of my online Art teachers - Amelia Critchlow - and some fellow students who was I to say no! We spent the afternoon talking art, blogging and families. We had great fun with a creative photography exercise - taking 36 magic-themed photographs in 36 minutes... Then we chatted some more, reviewed each other's masterpieces, drank more coffee and ate cake.

Now at home I'm drinking wine and playing in PhotoShop. All in all a rather good day and just the tonic I needed to 'fill my well'.

I'll shut up now and let me photos do the talking!! After the first one there's not many that actually say 'London' to you - not a red bus in sight! They were all taken around The South Bank, then mixed up with a few textures and filters.

There's more on flickr - I've gone a bit mad!

Finished! and... a collaboration...

Well look at me - a whole month of blog posting and art. Yup, every single day my fingers ran across this keyboard, picked up pencils, splashed paint and played in Photoshop. What an adventure!

You know, it really was. I'll admit that the blog posts were far harder than the art. Art can after all be a doodle, a dab, a splash (not that it was ever just that to be honest - I always got far too carried away!). I did learn though that sometimes we make our best art when we just play and don't try too hard.

Of course, we can't let this month go by without some more serious introspection. Why do I love art and blogging so much? Is it escapism? Well, it certainly stops me noticing the housework that needs doing! More seriously though sometimes I wonder if my dreams of creating my own art business and my focus on constant improvement and learning are not an excuse for avoiding more difficult things - like trying to find new business for my 'day job'.

I was a networking event mid-month and going through the usual spiel about what I do. By day I am an internal communications specialist, a corporate journalist, a creator of presentations - but I also confessed my dreams of becoming an artist. The lady I was talking to told me that when I talked about my painting, my whole face lit up, she said she could see the passion burning inside of me. I know for sure that creating something from coloured water and a sheet of paper makes me feel so wonderful - a narcotic for the soul to which I am truly addicted. Is there any hope?

There's no reason why I can't do both of course and that's the plan. I see myself running a little portfolio of businesses - all focused around some form of creation.

So perhaps, it's OK to keep up this dream; to search for enough hours in the day to make it work! I do really believe that if you write down your goals you will reach them. A few weeks ago, I put out an idea into the blogosphere of doing a guest post somewhere and guess what... It happened! This very day you can see my collaboration with 'Healing Woman' Cheryl Dolby. She creates the most wonderful sculptures and jewellery and I've written a little story to go alongside one of them. Do pop along and let us know what you think!

Finally finished this piece I started last week. A little bit here, a little bit there. Really pleased with the finished outcome.

Tales from the landlocked mermaid

When I began blogging, like I'm sure the rest of you, I had little clue of what I was doing. I hadn't even really looked at other people's blogs. All I knew was I needed an outlet for my writing. Then I discovered the delightul hobby of blog hopping. A few leaps and I landed on Carmen's site - Writing from Life - an Aladdin's cave of artful tales and treasures from a land-locked mermaid. I was spell-bound by her imagination and amazed at the incredible techniques she must be using to create her art. You could say that my love affair with mixed media art began here.

One day the summer before last I read on her site that she'd joined Jamie Ridler's Wreck this Journal Group. Sounded like fun to me, so I signed up too. Another momentous step in my life. That project was a total eye-opener for me. Every week myself and bloggers across the globe splodged, ripped and tattied our journals, sharing our creative output and letting loose so many of the fears that bind our creativity. It was roundabout this time that my artistic output exploded like the most vibrant firework. Suddenly I realised that art didn't have to be neat and perfect. It could be mess. It could be made of bits of old rubbish. It most certainly was fun!

And there I was surrounded by this amazing group of new friends, all offering support and encouragement. Some I've really got to know and enjoy spending time sipping a virtual coffee with while we talk about inspiration and admire each other's handiwork and Carmen is one of these.

When she decided to launch a new blog, I just knew I'd love to interview her over here to sell her talent to anyone who has had the misfortune not to come across her before.

And so, with apologies for this being such a big post (it's worth the read, I promise), may I present my interview with the lady herself - Carmen! (All the artwork and photographs on this post are hers).

Tell us something about the birth of your new blog
I really love expressing my creativity and interests here on this page, This blog along with my previous blogs are a way to express myself creatively. Blogs are such a great way to connect with so many like-minded souls, and the sense of connecting, getting inspired and opportunity for growth motivates me to keep on sharing my own unique voice, mind and heart with this world. I wish with all of my heart with this new blog to motivate and inspire others to live creatively, because after all, we find inspiration from each other and art has an incredible power.

Each person who comes creates will bring their own message, emotion or interpretation. I am hoping that someone who sees my blog will be inspired to do the same.

How did you come up with the name?
As a blogger, as someone who like many others proclaims myself as 'self taught', I follow my gut in creating something even when the concept behind a piece isn’t clear in the beginning - or even at the end! In my posts I admit that I enjoy experimenting or that I have learned a new technique by much trial and error and keep on going and trying, (and honestly I know I still have so much to learn). I thought: Yes, I need courage to be brave enough to put my artwork and my experiments out there for others to see. And yes, I need a playground, to remind me to stay grounded and not to take myself too seriously, and the rest of the name is part of who I truly and deeply am and believe: Imagination, beauty and love.

What’s next on the creative wish list?
Over the years my life's path has taken me in many directions which is a good thing - my present is exciting at this very moment, I am so grateful for that! So, I have blown a little wish out there and hopefully will become a reality when the time is right. I have many many reasons to feel that will happen sooner rather than later ;-)

Meanwhile, all I want is to keep on sharing my process, I want to offer mostly a visual treat for my blog visitors, I want to share some aspects of my life too, specifically with photography,
visual journaling, mixed media art work, cooking and gardening. On occasion I would also like to offer and share little reflections or life poems of what I am feeling at the moment.

And thirdly, I will keep organizing round robins or art exchanges once a year for everyone who wishes to challenge herself in this kind of fun commitments.

I want to share and invite you to believe in yourself, and live creatively in the moment, and from the past, learn from it but let it go.

What artists have blown you away recently?
There are so many!!! it is difficult to name names, but I really enjoy both the life stories and craft of Mary Ann Moss And Lori-Lyn Hurley.

How has your work changed over the years?
There are so many more techniques, materials and art supplies involved in my art nowadays. Practice, confidence, and the desire to offer more is a part of that. Recently, I tried a hand on assemblage involving vintage knick-knacks, some old photos and fabric which was fun.

Creativity has always been a big part of my life. As young 4 years old I was already playing with paper and paints, all the way to my teenage years. And in between, I grew a love of homemaking. At 12, I started sewing and making jewelry. And for obvious reasons I keep getting myselft into a lot of DIY projects; tools fascinate me to tell you the truth I even use them to make textures and shapes in my abstract paintings.

What are your favorite techniques?
For this, you are going to need your imagination, a pen and several scraps of paper.
Are you ready? Doodle, doodle, doodle to your heart’s content! Another one I love and you can see clearly in all of my artwork is textured tissue paper with acrylics.

How does nature influence your work?
I grew up very close to my grandmother who was besides a seamstrees, cook, crafter, and many more things, also a gardener. From her, I learned the names for every tree, herb, plant, wild and delicate flower.

I think because of this exposure with nature at a very early age, I learned to respect it greatly and follow my instincts on knowing how to take care of it, too. And noticed every single thing going on. So yes, nature is my guru, too, and oh my how much I love the ocean and the change of seasons. Put it this way, in my lunchtime, I get all ready to go out and my colleagues say to me: where are you going? It is raining out there! Or it is too hot!

And there was this other time when started to snow and I went out and opened my arms and felt in paradise and felt like writing! Yes, I am happiest outdoors sitting in the grass or in a blanket or with my toes squishing in the sand, with rain or sunshine!

What’s your ideal creative day?
Breathing deeply, practicing kindness, taking nothing personally and seeing EVERYTHING as an opportunity to learn, grow and to live in the present moment. So that includes spending time with my loved ones; people watching; reading to be inspired; browsing around farmers' markets, thrift stores & flea markets; being outdoors; enjoying a cup of coffee, tea or a glass of wine; and
my solo dates - I'm especially good at these! I seek solace at home, in my garden and with my art. Nurturing yourself is definitely good for the soul; in return you get the clearest mind and a heart at ease.

"Today you are you, that is truer than true. There is no one alive that is you-er than you"

Dr Seuss

Thank you so much for your time my friend! It was a pleasure to interview you. Maybe one day we might actually get to meet!

Homework

I'm amazed at how much my life has been changed by my art and how influenced and helped by the online tribe I belong to. I'm awake early on a Sunday and diligently doing my Suzi Blu Siren class homework - sketching out some mermaids and familiarising myself with drawing a body and a tail! It's an absolute pleasure just playing with pencils and trying to form a 'realistic' shape. Neither sketch is perfect, but that doesn't matter - it's all the fun of experimenting and sharing those results with your friends online. It's all part of the journey... (gosh, I'm starting to sound like someone on a talent show...).

Mermaid 1 was based on a picture of a lady I found sitting clutching her knees in a magazine. She was in a bath and clearly dreaming of being a siren of the sea, so I indulged her in her fantasy. I thought a rear view might be an easy one to try (but it wasn't!). Adding a tail instead of legs was also 'interesting' and I ran out of paper as you can see, but I loved the idea of the mermaid looking out to see and dreaming... Perhaps she is dreaming of being a lady seated in a bath clutching her knees?

Ha! After posting, I realised she's missing something vital - her other arm!

Mermie 2 was proper Suzi homework based on her instruction. The interesting colour scheme leaked through from the other side of the page where I've been experimenting in background techniques! I think this creature may be a little wide on the hips. Perhaps she's been indulging in one too many oysters... I think the trick here is clearly to get your tail length in proportion, too short and she'll look stumpy and have trouble swimming away from sharks.

I think I should mention here that this is an Irish freshwater mermaid. Of course, you can't actually hear the music where you are, but I can. She's playing Riverdance and perfecting her Mermie moves...

Naturally, as it is Sunday and these are Sketches, I am posting them over on Sophia's site where you can swim along and take a look at what the other participants are creating with their pencils and pens...

Anyone notice?

Well, I hope you did! What do you think of my new look? I felt it was time for a little refreshment of my blog and really wanted to include something of my own in the design.

What I didn't know though was how to put it on my blog, and make a fancy banner and get the template to work and... you're getting the idea.

So, I clicked my heels three times and called out to the fairy Godmother of Plumrose Lane - she the purveyor of phantasmagorical designs and curator of whimsical treasures. You can find weaving her magic here in her shop hidden in the hedgerow or on her blog.

Just follow the silken trails of enchantment and breathe in the scents of anticipation... She waved her magic wand and the spell was cast....

We took one of my paintings and a photograph I'd taken of a mysterious looking stairway that seemed steeped in story and this is the result. Now, it's probably about time I updated my profile...

After the party - Part 2

I was going to write "I don't really know many bloggers..." but of course that would be a total lie - I know hundreds! However, I'm sure you can follow where I was going with this. I am of course talking about the people I see on a regular basis, pick up the phone to - they've just never grasped the concept quite like I have. They don't feel that same urge to commit their words of wisdom to the world wide web. Nor do they spend their evenings travelling the globe via the written word and painted picture devouring the thoughts and creations of others and taking that inspiration to make something unique to them.

So, on Wednesday, when I was lucky enough to be in a room full of bloggers, writers and people passionate about both, I really did feel in my element! (see previous post for all the details)

It got me thinking though - about siezing opportunity. I wonder how many people saw the note posted on British Mummy Bloggers and were intrigued and would have loved to have been there, but just didn't bother. It's too easy to say no after all, to find the excuses so we don't have to make an effort and put ourselves out just a little bit.n But if we don't then how do we move forward? How can we possibily achieve our potential? What will we miss?

It wasn't that easy to go to this event. I had to arrange childcare and structure my working week around it. I knew I'd be tired the next day and the train fare wouldn't be cheap, but look at what I gained.

I met one of my favourite authors and came away inspired to write anew; I spent the evening talking about writing, blogging and creativity; I got to know some incredibly interesting new people and found even more new blogs to follow. I even got a few glasses of free wine and a scrummy goodie bag full of books - and chocolate! But most of all I took away a wonderful experience. So, if anyone out there wants to organise any more get-togethers, you can count on me to attend. Now, who would I like to meet...???

You can also read about the event at Adventures of an English Mum, Efe Fabulous and The Musings of Ondo Lady

After the party...

The perfect story for Happy Friday...

Would I like to go to London, meet one of my favourite authors and spend an evening in the company of bloggers? Hmm, not too difficult a decision to be made there then... Was I seriously ever likely to turn down such an opportunity? So, Wednesday saw me on a speeding train to my favourite City full of anticipation.

Lisa Jewell writes wonderful books - sort of chick lit but with more depth, a stronger sense of reality with characters that seem recognisable, that friends-of-friends feeling. I've grown up with her books and, in her latest book more than ever have found that I'm relating to her characters.

Ten years ago Lisa wrote her first novel - Ralph's party - in which Ralph, an artist struggling to capture his Muse, finds her in flatmate Jem. Naturally, numerous obstacles were to be climbed before they made it into each other's arms but make it they did and all seemed destined to live happily ever after. When I read this 10 years ago, I was right in the middle of what I thought would be my happy ending too - on the cusp of marriage. Mine didn't turn out as planned - would Ralph and Jem's?

Well, ten years later and in the sequel Ralph and Jem have done some growing. Two children increased the size of their family and a gaping chasm of failed communication, resentment, frustration and total lack of understanding pushes them apart. The book begins shortly after the birth of their second child. Ralph, not coping well with all that life throws at him decides he needs a holiday and heads off to Santa Monica to visit an old friend leaving Jem well and truly holding the baby...

I found this hard to read... Echos of my own past with a husband feeling the need to get away on holiday on his own leaving his exhausted wife at home with the baby came flooding all too painfully back. Here was a writer who it seemed had been inside my head and come face to face with my communication issues, my resentment and contempt. I wasn't expecting this. This isn't 20-something or even 30-something chick lit escapism. This is real life.

Ten years had done another thing to all of us. We weren't on the cusp of being 30 any more either! Jem and I, it seemed have both gone through the same freaking out over approaching the big 40. By now I was beginning to believe that Lisa Jewell had been reading my mind or was she just perhaps picking up on the issues of our time? Was I not alone after all?

This was a good, strong read. Clever, insightful and a little bit gritty also spring to mind. I wonder what a fresh-faced 25 year old would make of it? For a fresh-faced (but with a few wrinkles) 40 year old it was shockingly close to life. But, it also made me feel a bit better. Remember I said that Lisa's characters always felt familiar - like friends you just hadn't met yet. Well, this week I shared a good old chat with Jem and Ralph and we all learnt that you come out of the other side of experiences like these much stronger!

If you've never read Lisa's books, go check them out - great stuff!

As it's Friday, this is definitely my happy post for the week. I had such a wonderful time at this event in the company of some like-minded souls. In fact, there is so much more to say, but I must start my day... Part 2 coming up later.

Stay tooned...

Lisa & Lisa

The Retreat

No, I didn't surrender, there was no white flag or running away. It was my creative retreat.

Before I go any further I would like to give a huge thank you to everyone that contributed to my previous post. I was, quite frankly, overwhelmed by the response. You were all there in the room with me when I ran my "How blogging changed my life" session and I hope I opened some minds to the possibilities and wonderful people out there. Blogging has shrunk the world for me and welcomed me as a member into creative and inspirational tribes.

I spent a wonderful afternoon in the presence of some fab ladies - some I knew already and others new friends to be made. We learnt hand massage, networked, explored our dreams, checked out this season's fashion styles and trends as well as the aforementioned blogging session.

This week, as I rushed from 'day job' to preparation for this event I began to question my sanity in taking on such an adventure. Why couldn't I be content pottering around the garden on a sunny Saturday or doing the supermarket shop?

Well, of course the answer was always there in my face... Because that's not me. I am happiest when pushing myself, when exploring and stretching out into the universe. I perform best with a bit of pressure. In the end it was all worth it. I enjoyed myself, my fellow organiser Tina enjoyed herself and I'm pretty certain our guests did too.

So Tina... when shall we organise the next one?

(Will I be taking it easy over the coming weeks? Not a chance... Coming up next I'm joining the Experimental Art e-Course; the Inspirational Avenue blog party (see badge in sidebar) and I'm travelling to London to meet the chicklit author Lisa Jewell when she launches her new book and spend the evening with a bunch of Mummy bloggers... Can't wait!

PS: Well, although this picture wasn't exactly the location of today's retreat - I believe in thinking big and this can be an extension of the dreamboard I created today. One day... Watch this space!

It's all about YOU

Hey there bloggers. This post is about you (and I also want something...) On Saturday, my friend Tina and I host our first ladies' creative retreat. I'm very excited, incredibly nervous and in something of a panic because I'm not quite ready yet (still a few days... calm down...).

I'm running a session on blogging. More specifically, I wanted to share my story of how beginning to unleash a bit of myself here in Bloglandia opened up the most wonderful outpouring of creativity which had been shut away in my soul for so many years.

For me it has not just been about the outlet - a place to write and share - but the results. I could never have predicted that within just a few months of writing my first post I would find myself a part of wonderful tribe of like-minded spirits.

Hopping from blog to blog to read the words and admire the work of others took me on a magical journey and introduced me to some of the most inspirational people I have never met! It seemed that one minute I was sitting at home alone in front of the pc tapping away at the keyboard and suddenly a magic wand was waved and I was transported to coaching circles, tea parties, art lessons and craft workshops. I was surrounded by the fun, passion, creativity and empathy of my fellow bloggers from across the globe. I had new friends from a few miles down the road to California to Sydney to Malaysia and I had readers from countries I needed to check on an atlas to see where they were (Guam being case in point - it's a bit East of the Phillipines if you're wondering).

This wonderful journey not only prompted me to put finger to keyboard but also paintbrush to canvas and if I wasn't wrecking journals with Jamie Ridler and her crew, I was inspired by the prompts of the likes of Mixed Media Monday, The Three Muses and a host of others.

I attended parties and through one of these met up with the lovely ladies of Inspiration Avenue who encouraged me to open my own shop on Etsy and join their little team of supportive friends.
I've experimented with fiction and mixed media. I've found and taken part in art courses.

Above all I have found myself and for this I yell to you from the rooftops of England - THANK YOU! It's this I want to share with the attendees at the retreat on Saturday. I'll be sharing links to many of your blogs and singing your praises and I wondered if you would like to contribute to the session by adding a sentence or two describing how blogging has unleashed your creativity, inspired you, led you to new experiences and friendships. It would be wonderful to share this post with the group on Saturday - it's the only way I can think of to get you all there to be presenting with me!

So, what are you waiting for my friends? Tell me what blogging means to you!

With thanks,

WrightStuff

The musical accompaniment is there for no other reason than it popped in my head when I came up with the title for this post!

A missed anniversary

I thought I would sit and plan my one year anniversary blog post. It's at the end of the month right? WRONG! It was last week! Oh well, never mind. I guess it doesn't really matter when we celebrate. I've been having similar thoughts about my 40th birthday party which I have still to organise. I can't say I really feel much like going out much in this weather. I'd rather wait until the summer and have friends round all day for a barbie. I can hear a steady dripping on the windowsill. Is it melting snow or rain?

Anyway... Yipee! One year of blogging, well done me. Time to reflect and share some deep thoughts on the matter. A matter indeed that ties in very well with today - Friday - when I share happy thoughts from the week for Jamie's Happy Book Group.

How many posts have I written then? 281! Wow! I can't even remember what prompted me to start in the first place aside from a desire to write, but how happy am I that I did. I can confidently say that this blog has changed my life. How's that for a bold statement? So, how?


1. I have made new friends across the world. This was an unexpected bonus, but one I treasure so dearly.

2. I have rediscovered my love and passion for art and grown in ways I never thought possible. I picked up a paintbrush again around the same time I started this blog, but at first it was the same old watercolour flowers and landscapes that I'd always painted. Then, I came across a blogging group who together 'Wrecked their Journals' (thank you so much for pulling this one together Jamie!) and that was it - something was released and I haven't looked back. Watercolour rarely gets a look-in these days when so much fun can be had with mixed media. I found all these wonderful creative challenge sites where the support from the wonderful artist has helped me grow and develop as, dare I say it, an artist. Without this support and encouragement (particularly from the ladies at Inspiration Avenue) I would never have dreamed of opening my own Etsy shop let alone actually selling anything I had made. Thank you one and all. If I could hug you now I would. I've taken online courses I found via my blog hopping and have seen my work grow and develop. I really feel like I've made some progress.

3. Writing is becoming second nature. Last year I promised myself to try and write every day and this blog has been the natural catalyst. And I love it! Words pour from me rich with creative juice. I've learnt from both the writing and the art that what is most important is that I do this for me, that I am happy with the outcomes. Receiving positive comments is naturally the icing on the cake and adding to the list of followers gives me a warm glow, but I am proud of myself too. I feel like I have really achieved something by sticking at it.

4. I fill my evenings with all the above, rather than watching mindless drivel on TV just because it's there. Most evenings will find me floating off somewhere around the world via my pc or if not that, delving into a fantasy art world land. When I'm creating - whether words or pictures, I feel like I'm doing what I'm meant to do. I am ME and that is someone who went missing for a while. I'm pleased to have her back and keep buying her nice treats like paintbrushes, clear gesso, pretty fibres, canvas boards....

Yes, it does have its downsides. Sometimes I spend far too much time travelling blogland and painting when I should be doing something else (notably cleaning the house), but hey that's not too high a price to pay is it?

Happy Blog Anniversary to me - and thank you to all those who helped it happen - you know who you are. You have done more for me than you can possibly imagine.

Something cosmic happening?

Ah, how I love blogging... But then again, why wouldn't I? It's writing about what I love - the only boring subjects are of my choosing! It has also opened up a whole new world to me. I've made new friends across the globe; I've hooked up with other like-minded souls - writers and artists just like me. I've opened myself up to a new creative world I neither knew existed 'out there' or 'in here' [she taps heart dramatically, but gently]. I'm reading the kinds of books I always shied away from* and consequently learning things about myself - both who I am and where I want to be.

*(self-help, rather than gruesome horror - I still shy away from those).

Now we move onto an exciting revelation. If you stop by here regularly to while away ten minutes or so with a cup of tea or a glass of wine, you cannot have helped noticing that I am a teensy weensy bit dis-satisfied in my current role. Last week I endured the disappointment of losing out on another job for which I felt more suited. But then when you don't get it, you start thinking - was it the job I really wanted or the means to leave this current torture? I'm not entirely sure. If it was the latter, then I did a jolly good job of convincing myself of the former - though clearly not the interviewers! Maybe I don't want to do 'internal communications' anymore. Perhaps it's not the job that gets me down so much as the vocation? I feel tired of the corporate life. It just doesn't feel like me anymore.

On a seemingly un-related matter, I received in the post a postcard from royalty - None other than the Queen of Creativity herself. She had sent me this as part of an exercise she was working on while working through The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron. I resolved to post one right back and thought about what I would send.

Well, the town where I live lacks architectural delights I'm afraid. The river that runs through could be so charming were it not for the shopping trolleys and empty beer cans and the inhabitants are not pretty. The town where I work however, is something else (see attractive looking building in image supplied, yes for those in the New World, this is a bona fide Medieval Castle, complete with dungeons, suits of armour and a gift shoppe - if you look closely you might just spot Rapunzel letting her hair down one of the towers).

As the choice of postcard neatly presented itself to me, so did another far more exciting possibility. You see, I've always loved castles, stately homes, palaces, ruins, manor houses... those old buildings steeped in history and priceless works of art. If I visit anywhere remotely grand I still can't resist sweeping down staircases swishing my imaginary skirts or imagining bold knights fighting for my hand. I'll hover by a window overlooking immaculate acres and wonder who stood before and who they observed from behind the tapestry drapes. Yes, an over-active imagination is mine and I am proud of it.

So, the revelation? Could I perhaps work somewhere like Warwick Castle? Althorp House? Sulgrave Manor? Could I be a custodian of the National Trust? Take tourists on magical journeys around haunted mansions, bringing the past back to life before their very eyes? Oh yes, I could do that... I would love that - it would suit my extrovert personality. I'd even happily dress up in costume to do it (in fact, I would probably pay them for the chance to dress up in costume...particularly anything with a swishing skirt). Last night my mind began to race with new possibility. Could this be what I'm looking for or a simple distraction? I tapped into some of the (little practiced) skills I've been learning on the The Joy Diet (see numerous posts) - I looked for my truth and desire. Is this what I want? Imagine the story ideas I'd get working in a castle... Think of the creative inspiration being surrounded by art all day... Imagine the mischief winding up tourists about ghosts and secret passages....

Kate - you sent me a postcard of some mountains and a lake as part of the Artists' Way and look what has happened... Something cosmic happening in the universe perhaps? Is this going to see me stretching my wings, or just a flight of fancy? Well, let's turn the page of the next chapter and wait and see...

Err, and Kate, it looks like I just spoilt the postcard surprise. Never mind, I'll send you another!

A would be what?

105 posts in and time for a spot of reflection. I should have done this five posts ago but the moment passed without me realising and then there was always something else to write about!

When I set this up one chilly night in February I sub-titled it musings of a would-be writer. I truly didn't expect that I would find quite so much to write about or what a creative journey I would be embarking upon. Finding all these other lovely blog people has been a real inspiration. I love bouncing from one site to another following the link love!

Well, am I a would-be writer? Some very nice people have pointed out that I am in fact already a writer which was a lovely thing to say. After 100 posts I guess I feel like a writer too. The novel may still be residing cosily in my head in a chilled out pose, but I've achieved a new year resolution: I write (nearly) every day and above all I enjoy it. I love writing! There, I've admitted it now!

I would like to consider myself a would-be artist. You never know, I might sell something one day :)

Much as it pains me to admit I am also well on the way to becoming a would-be expert in broadcasting and transmission and satellites and stuff. Though fear not, the very fact that I had to write "and stuff" shows just how far away this currently is. This week my six month work contract was extended to permanent. They want to keep me which is jolly nice of them and they seem pleased with what I've done so far. Half of me wants to say "more fool them" or possibly "more fool me for saying yes" but I guess I must have done an alright job here and there. It feels a bit like I'm only firing on minimal cylinders though. I've still not really clicked at all with the subject or the culture of the business. It's such a dichotomy to my real passions - my writing and creating, disappearing into a land of fantasy inhabited by elves and fairies or getting up to my elbows in scraps of paper and acryllics. It sure is a different world at work. Today, for example, I discovered that Jack Field and Anna Morphic are not actually employees of the company but in fact engineering terms.

And on that ridiculous joke, I will leave this rambling for this evening as I have to finish wrecking my journal in time for tomorrow's end of term celebration party! Night folks!

Everyone's a winner

Well, look at me. I am the proud owner of a Watermelon blogging award for my perseverance in the pursuit of my art and blogging. Thank You Hybrid J for bestowing this accolade on little old me! I must say, I'm nearly 100 posts in after 4 months which is exhibiting some pretty good staying power. I never thought I'd find so much to write about, nor did I expect to find so many other like-minded cool chicas out there. (Chica is my word of the week - a little expression I picked up from a fellow blogger across the pond!).

But do you know what? It's actually been far easier than I thought, mainly because it's just so enjoyable sitting in front of the PC of an evening and just letting the words escape from my fingertips. Back in January, I made myself a promise that I would write something (nearly) every day to gain that sense of personal satisfaction that comes from just creating. And look what it has led to... Creativity is bursting forth out of the cupboards it has been hidden in, art supplies are finally seeing the light of day, inspiration is my food and sustenance (along with chocolate, naturally). Despite the fact that the novel has made zero progress, I am pleased with what I have achieved with my other endeavours. The novel will come. If I've learnt anything from my journal wrecking experience, it's not to be too precious about it. I'll just write from the heart - something I'll enjoying doing. It doesn't have to be Pullitzer Prize winning. It just has to be mine.

So thank you Hybrid J for bestowing this award on me and providing inspiration for yet another blog post. And thanks go to a few other 'cool chicas' whose blogging has the power to light the creative spirit in us all.


I would therefore like to pass the melon along (careful, it's heavy!) to:

• Writing from Life
• Living Creatively
• Sujati Art
• Dirty Footprints (the chica lady)
• The Queen of Creativity

And apologies to anyone I missed. Hence the title of the post!

Youth of today (grumblings from a nearly 40 year old)

Yes, well it happens to all of us eventually... We turn into one of those "things were much better in my day" orators. We even find ourselves moaning that we can't hear the words on songs and asking what gender the lead singer is in that noisy band on the TV (mind you, let's face it, the first time we saw Boy George we all wondered didn't we now?). So, here we go...

Youth of today eh? They just don't know they're born. Take my boyfriend's 16 year old son, Tyler. He has ambitions to go to university, study media and become a journalist or work in TV. Not wishing to dash such fresh-faced hopes, I put my wise old(ish) woman hat on and advise him, using my many years experience of the real working world, how to ensure he gets himself noticed. The more observant among you will have noticed that I quite like blogging, so naturally I steered him in this direction as a virtually effortless method of seeing your work in 'print' instantaneously with a potential readership of millions (not bad for a free online tool). If he's willing to put in a bit of extra effort he could even start a school e-zine distributed via Facebook or at the other end of the spectrum if he wishes to communicate only in short sentences (he is a teenager remember... grunts are an integral part of his vocabulary), then twitter could be his channel of choice. Let's face it, the opportunity is endless. The effort fairly minimal.

What is essential of course is that he approaches his University applications with some tangible evidence of his passion for his chosen profession. Faced with a pile of identical applications and predicted grades, he will need to stand out by demonstrating determination, ambition and writing skill. Lecture over, it is now time for me to indulge in a spot of reminiscence... and when Tyler you read this (no doubt under extreme duress) at the weekend, I will be able to lament that you never had it so good.

Back when I were a wee gal the word blog didn't even exist let along the technology to power it. The closest thing to a net I had at home was one used for catching fishes in Cornish rock pools. If we wanted to keep a diary we bought one and wrote in it using a pen or pencil (often with real ink that came in a pot!).

My first magazine editorship - the imaginatively titled Pelargonium - consisted of one childish scrawled and illustrated copy that had to be passed around its expansive readership of the other kids in the street and my family! I was so dedicated that I wrote 6 of them!

When a group of us started a school magazine in the 6th form, it was mainly hand-written with a few 'special' pages typed on an old machine called a typewriter (powered by fingers pressing very hard on keys on stalks), then the whole thing was photocopied at great expense and drawing in a few favours at a local print shop (and let's not even mention Banda machines - remember them? The original wind up photocopier). Also, when we went on holiday we used to buy these little pictures, write on the back and post them back home to friends and family... postcards I think they were called...

I think there's still something very special about the physical presence of an old diary or notebook. My sister has some old diaries belonging to my Grandmother. Most of these date back to the 1940s during the war years in London. She describes a life seemingly full of wash days, dodging bombs and going to the movies. It seemed that, despite a lack of money, the threat of a doodle-bug landing on your head at any moment and being heavily pregnant, nothing would get in the way of a weekly trip to 'the pictures'. Communication with loved ones was not the instant gratification of the 21st century. I can just picture her waiting for cherished letters every day from my Grandad serving in the army.

It is wonderful to be able to treasure these records of the past. I wonder if my future grandchildren will ever read this blog, created on the ancient and clumsy Internet. A technological dinosaur where you actually had to sit down and type words into the computer rather than just 'think them' onto the mobile screen that transmits from the device embedded in your wrist...

Youth of the future eh?

Err, right...

Hope you've not just eaten. My first attempt at a funky background to my blog may need some work... You have to admit though, it has potential. I found this site while zooming around from Etsy to blogs and stole some inspiration. Many more hours of fun to be had methinks...

What's it all for?

As stated, this blog is about me becoming a writer. I will detail my journalistic exploits, my verrryy-sloooow-toooooo-progressss-novelll and have a good old time writing posts in here. But it's something else too... a conversation starter! I know you're reading this, I can see you there you know. So how about a comment or two? Of course, it's partly my fault that my conversation is a little one-sided (apart from my sister and a fellow stationery lover who I accosted when they were least expecting it). What is missing in my missives is a call to action - a question like... what do you think? Not just about my blog but about my musings - what's your view on Gok for example? By the way I bet Torres and his chums were cursing the football schedules last night. That's two Tuesdays in a row they've had to go to work at the same time Gok is on! I'm going to shoot off on a tangent now, mainly because I am very tired and my mind is all over the place. Let's talk football. Why is it that when I sit down to watch a match with my boyfriend, inevitably it proves to be a dull run around by 22 over-paid grown men failing to get the ball in the back of the net, then when I'm watching Gok (and don't have SkySports anyway) what happens? I'll tell you what... 8 goals and 2 in the last couple of minutes. Now that's what I call a football match. Boyfriend, aka Arsenal obsessive, kindly filled me in on many of the goals by phone update (which was very entertaining as, every time he called, Liverpool equalised) and then, I have to confess, in very small type, I did actually put on SkySports News to catch the final moments and see the goal replays ... Well... what can I say? A closet Gooners fan!
Right, 6 minutes until the Apprentice starts. I am allowing myself an hour's slob on the sofa and an early night. So, if my some miracle you are still managing to follow this - how about joining in with a bit of writing of your own?

The emphasis of this blog has shifted slightly from my original aspirations. It was supposed to be detailing my ambitions and successes in my drive to become a professional writer. Instead, it has turned into an outlet for me to experiment with writing about a wide variety of topics - a place to capture my creative flow and give it some study. One thing I do know, and this is probably evident from the number of posts (as well as numerous 'work in progress' ideas scribbled on any writable surface and dotted around my desk...), I'm really loving writing it! I hope that you're getting some enjoyment from reading it too.